So, I find it ironic that on a day I intend to blog about how important a good night's sleep is to your overall health and fitness journey, I end up staying up until about 1:30am when I need to be up at 7am the next morning.  Huh.. interesting how life throws those curve balls at you.

I have been going to be around midnight for the last couple of weeks, and have really been thanking myself for it.  I have an easier time getting up in the morning (but, it's still a fight), find that I have more energy throughout the day, and I don't get the same heavy/acidic feeling in my stomach that I used to wake up with regularly.

Sadly, this morning, those feelings returned.  It did not help that we went to Denny 's after swimming.. and I couldn't really find anything somewhat healthy that seemed appealing.  I ended up having some chicken strips and a garden salad.  Doesn't sound too bad, right?  While it could have been worse, I definitely will not be repeating that mistake.  The salad was alright, but didn't have any dark, leafy greens; just bagged iceberg lettuce.  The chicken strips were tasty, but loaded with salt and other horrific things, I'm sure.  While certain chicken strips are alright for this whole diet change thing, these ones must be closer to the "totally awful" end of the scale.

All I can do is learn from the mistake, remember this feeling, and try not to repeat it.  While indulging is okay every now and then, this was not one of my cheat days.  Gotta keep that in check.

I was told by my husband to "get off [my] high horse" when I was a little distressed that I couldn't find anything that fit into my plan.  I tried looking up the nutritional information on my phone, but it's old, and cranky, and didn't want to load properly.  I've decided that I am no longer going to look for him for support. This is my journey, my recovery, and me taking charge of my life.  He is lucky enough to have never had to struggle with an eating disorder, so, as cliche as it sounds, he simply doesn't understand the struggle.  I'm not making excuses for him, I'm trying to make it easier for me to not depend on his support or encouragement because he's made it clear he's not going to offer either.

I promised myself no shame. No hate. No guilt.  I'm not going to let those feelings get to me. They're banished.  I won't let myself accept those feelings, and I sure as hell am not going to let him make me feel those things.